Frozen’s been out for a fair amount of time now, and I have seen it. I’ve seen it a number of times actually, and through all the catchy songs, the charismatic moose and messages of sisterhood that are some pretty terrible messages in that movie.
What! Terrible messages in a Disney Movie? Are you sure?
Yep, they’re not even well hidden either, as plain as the nose on your face. (Not meaning to insult your nose, I’m sure it’s very pretty.)
So, here they are the four things that Frozen teaches you that you should in no way take as a life lesson.
4. Good Parenting Starts at Home
The film starts off with the young Elsa accidentally harming her sister whilst they play. Elsa is only very young, and has not yet been taught the responsibility of owning great power. So with Anna gravely wounded by magic the loving and doting parents go to see the local troll, who sagely informs them that Anna is lucky this time but for the sake of both daughters, she is going to have to remove Anna’s memories of Elsa’s magic.
All good so far and it kinda makes sense. Then, and just to ensure that no harm can come to either child the parents decide it’s a good thing to lock Elsa in a room until she can control her magic.
That’s right Elsa’s parents imprison their daughter. Unable to leave the room she must have had a life only Josef Fritzl’s daughter would be envious of. I think it’s actually a good thing that the parents die from drowning, just to stop the mental and emotional abuse.
That’s not to mention Anna who has to deal with the fact that her best friend and sister is now locked up and ignoring her, for the next twelve or so years.
3. A Ruler to Rule us All
If you knew of someone who had spent the last twelve years locked away, struggling with controlling her magic, burdened with the news that her parents have just drowned, and who has had absolutely no contact with her the outside world except for presumably the staff who put her tray of gruel under the door of her cell-like bedroom, would you think “Well, she’ll make a good queen”?
Well, luckily Queens aren’t voted for so she becomes one anyway. No wonder she freaks out and nearly skewers everyone at the ball with large shards of ice. What would you expect?
2. Run Away!!!
The major lesson of the film or at least the song that every parent with a child under the age of 18 has been singing for the best eighteen months, is that if you feel burdened with pressure you should relax and ‘Let it go’. The song is shortly after everyone discovers Elsa has magic, she nearly kills a few people and then flees from the castle to wander over the snowy hills and sing her troubles away.
Well, I’m not buying it. That song should just be called ‘Run Away’. Run away if you can’t face your problems, run away rather than apologise for your mistakes. Ultimately, if there’s a situation you can’t deal with just scarper and hide in the mountains until it all goes away. That’s what strong role-models do? Oh wait, hang on. They don’t!
1. Cold Hearted Killer
When Elsa gets a bit mad at the ball, and starts what could basically be considered an ice age, the entire land is covered in snow and ice. Don’t worry though because by the end of the film she cancels the spell and gains control of all her powers and so on and the entire village loves her again.
Well hang on, what about the elderly and the young that would have been caught out by such a freak drop in temperature and all the wildlife that is in no way prepared for a change in weather like that. Then there are the plants, and the crops that would have been ruined by all that ice and snow.
Elsa, didn’t just make things a little nippy, she probably ruined the economy and production of the city for months and years to come. One of the first things Queen Elsa would have to do in power would be to raise taxes across the kingdom to pay for fixing the economy, unless she’s planning on selling ice sculptures, taxes are the only way to go.
Then again, at the end of the film no-one else in the town seems to care about the ruined economy and all the deaths. Though, I suppose, if my ruler could kill us all with ice spikes without drawing breath I’d be a little reticent about showing my displeasure as well.
Of, course maybe I’m misreading the whole thing. What do you think?
It seems like a fair while since I’ve written anything here. That’s mostly due to the fact that I have been insanely busy at work, and when I get home I just want to stare blankly at a television screen and attempt to stop the brains from dribbling out of my ears.
Keyboard Pizza 