Worry Wart

Fear Scared terror eyes afraidWell, it’s that time again. It’s lunchtime, I’ve stuffed a piri piri ham sandwich down my throat and now I’m raring to get on with today’s daily prompt, which I believe is one that I rather enjoy, although often find it tricky to do without rambling incoherently.

“Our ten-minute free-write is back! Have no mercy on your keyboard as you give us your most unfiltered self (feel free to edit later, or just publish as-is).”

In short, I have ten minutes to write about something, and as I never think it is worth preparing for these things, I apologise ahead of time if this is just a meaningless ramble.

Right, well this week has not been so great, yet. Nothing bad has happened but my mind has decided to dwell in a dark place for the past 72 hours. Just the usual thoughts or death, dismemberment, failure, and worry that sometimes plague my head.

Weirdly though, I’ve had a couple of nightmares this week as well. Weird in that I think the last time I had nightmares was about 25 years ago. There have been odd dreams and weird images but as far as actually having panting, sweating, scared out of my tiny mind, nightmares the experience is pretty darn rare.

The first nightmare was scarcely more than a single scene, I was watching the corner of a building, when someone came round the corner, looked at me and pointed a gun at me. That’s it, that’s all there was but it was enough to wake me up and twinned with the fantastically not-at-all funny insomnia that was my cue to get up at some ungodly time and be tired for the rest of the day.

The second nightmare lasted longer, I think, but I can’t really remember much of it. It featured zombie-like things coming after me, and then there was the usual waking up, sweating thing.

So, now of course, I’m starting to be anxious about if I am going to have any more of these and if I do what does it mean? Logically, I know I’m just stressed and there is a lot going on in my head at the moment, and my mind is choosing to ‘help’ me by keeping me up at night. But what type of OCD sufferer would I be if I didn’t worry that it was a brain tumor or something.

Oh, and the worry about putting live electric cables into my mouth hasn’t gone away either, so that’s fun.

I just need a holiday, i haven’t actually gone anywhere for any great length of time this year, so I confidently predict that a lengthy holiday will help to sort a lot of this out. Though, that will have to wait until Christmas.

Wow, I was right that was fairly rambling and a little bit depressing sorry about that. Here’s a bad joke to help lighten the mood.

“I sold my vacuum the other day… All it was doing was collecting dust.”

Courtesy of goodbadjokes.com

You have to laugh… right?

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4 thoughts on “Worry Wart”

  1. I did laugh, but I respected why you felt the need to add the joke. But, you don’t need to be funny. Say it as it is and don’t feel the need to apologise. OCD is a life sucker! You are doing well. Great writing style btw! X

    1. Thanks, some days are certainly better than others, and today is not awesome but at least it’s close to the weekend, which usually makes everything at least a little better.

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