Holy Crap! What a Turnaround

For those who have returned to this blog time and time again to read my endless and persistent whining about the difficulties I sometimes have in regards to work, sleeping and generally being just as fabulous as I often tend to think I’m not.

Well, over the past two weeks, it’s like someone has waved a magic wand over me. The troubles I had,  all melted away to nothing. What can I think is the reason behind this? Winning the lottery? Becoming famous? Maybe I’d found ‘The Hidden Treasure of the Sierra Madre?’

Nope, the magic cure is simply my new job. I briefly mentioned here how important it is to not do twelve hour days and how I learned that travelling distance is much more essential than I ever thought it could be.

It’s not just distance of course, I earn a little more money, the atmosphere is much more relaxed, and more importantly, I am using my mind for the first time in about 18 months. My previous job was an endless dirge of data entry and training, my new job puts me in charge of things…. A lot of things, more things than my brain knows how to deal with.

But you know what? I am sleeping again, my anxiety has dropped way down (except for driving which is a bit of a phobia for me) Without going in to too much detail, I am starting to feel happy, happy and tired at the moment, but tired for all the right reasons.

I wanted to write this post partly to let everyone know that I am feeling better, but ultimately to depart a piece of wisdom that I have learned over the past 18 months, that goes out especially to all the doubters and the worriers out there, the people who think whatever is wrong is down to them, the same people who never feel the need to look for alternatives.

I ended up being stuck in a job for 18 months that I hated, and the only reason I didn’t look for somewhere else sooner is that I thought it was all in my head. Well why wouldn’t I? I’ve had nervous, anxious and depressive feelings about a whole wealth of things from large to small, surely the feelings I have are just down to everything being new, It will fade as I get used to it.

Even after several months, and my feelings hadn’t changed I stayed with my original conclusion of it’s just me, it will go away.

Well, it didn’t. I had my breaking point, everybody does, but even when my sleep was suffering, I was woefully unhappy, I’d put on weight from over-eating, and other areas of my life had suffered which I won’t go into here, I still felt it would go away. I was now too scared to make a move because I had sunk so low, I couldn’t imagine anyone else hiring me. This was the best that I could get, all I deserved.

Well pish to that. Recognise why you’re not happy and resolve the issue as soon as you can. Being unhappy isn’t like a cold, It won’t just go away if you leave it. More likely, it will only get worse. Life isn’t a computer game, you don’t get extra lives, you can’t cheat or exploit your way through. Be happy in your one life.

Here endeth the lesson. 🙂


4 thoughts on “Holy Crap! What a Turnaround”

  1. A true lesson many could learn about staying stuck somewhere because of mistakenly thinking it’s “just me.” (Also, you may have just inspired me to quit my job 🙂

    1. It’s far easier to recognise when you’re happy than when you’re not. Unfortunately, recognising one is heavily reliant on the other.

      If your job’s not right for you, you already know what to do. You probably just don’t believe yourself.

      1. Very insightful point about recognizing when to move on (and how happiness/unhappiness shapes our capacity to recognize). On a personal note, I was half-kidding about this blog inspiring me to quit my job, but I will almost certainly move on from it in a year or so — I’m still happy enough to recognize “stuckness” coming on 🙂 )

So, what are you thinking?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s